do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
Randomize
