And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Randomize
