True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
