Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
I have peed in a lot of sinks
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
where are my eyebrows?
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