he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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