I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
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