I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
