So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
it glows. i had to have it.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
I shit you not. I was sitting on Brian's balcony...still drunk from the night before, and a hummingbird flew onto the patio, stared me right in the face and flew away. I feel like it was God's way of telling me, "Stop drinking."
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize