i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
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