i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
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