sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
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