your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
Randomize
