Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
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