He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
Dicks are not precious.
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
Randomize
