question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Randomize