I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
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