New low: just hacked my moms facebook
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
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