Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
Randomize
