I just found a frying pan...in my bed.
Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize
