i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
I licked your asshole in confidence.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Randomize
