can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
Randomize
