And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
She told me I should be a condom model.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
