so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
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