A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
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