I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Randomize
