Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
Randomize
