Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Randomize
