Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
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