So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
