I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
Do you have feelings for this penis?
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
