Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
Randomize
