i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
Randomize
