I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
Randomize
