Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
im holly from the hills drunk
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
