Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
Randomize
