yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Randomize
