his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
