I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
Dude there is a stripper at my door saying she has my birthday present. She knows my name...but it's not my birthday...
God works in mysterious ways my friend.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
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