So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
Randomize
