with your own penis?
Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
Randomize
