There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Randomize