just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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