Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
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