Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
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