just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
Randomize
