It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
Randomize
