My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
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