Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
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