I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
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