who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Randomize
