I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
no. you can't hotbox the world.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
my liver is dry heaving
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
Randomize
